


it's not about me

by regrettes



Category: The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin
Genre: Gen, dee dee learns to be a mother, this is after alyssa greene, this was a quick small idea i had last night, unrulyheartsweek, we have barry consoling emma but i felt like dee dee would console alyssa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-04
Updated: 2019-06-04
Packaged: 2020-04-07 12:52:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19085437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/regrettes/pseuds/regrettes
Summary: Dee Dee is on her way to talk to Tom again, to learn how to be a human being, and gets sidetracked when she encounters someone she didn't expect.





	it's not about me

Dee Dee Allen wasn’t a narcissist, she didn’t know the meaning of the word. She just cared a lot about herself, and wanted everyone else to know. She’d made it very well known that her ulterior motives for being in the middle of nowhere in Indiana were self-indulgent. But as she walked down the halls of the school, attempting to direct herself to Tom’s office, she couldn’t help but hear someone crying. Something pulled her toward it, a motherly urge of sorts, even though she didn’t recognize the crying. It wasn’t Emma’s, she’d heard enough of that after the fake prom to recognize it right away. This was softer, more subdued but somehow even sadder. She followed it down the hall, toward an unmarked door where the sounds were originating. She hesitated for a moment, a knot in her stomach telling her that this wasn’t a good idea. She didn’t know how to _feel_ for other people. Empathy was not her stock-in-trade, and there was no way it was about to start to be. Her fist was poised and ready to knock on the door and suddenly, she didn’t know why or how she planned to help whoever was crying on the other side.

 

Once again that force that led her to the door had her knuckles rapping on the door, her voice a little too loud as she asked, “Uhm, are you okay in there?” She could have attracted someone’s attention, but she didn’t have an indoor voice, or not one that she knew about, so there wasn’t any way for her to quietly get the person’s attention. The crying quieted down to a sniffle here and there before a weak voice called back to her. She couldn’t quite make out what was said however, so she fiddled with the doorknob a little, asking again, “Are you okay? I couldn’t quite hear you!” Her voice was a little softer this time, as the door opened and she found herself stepping into what seemed to be a band closet. The sight she was met with almost broke her heart, a young girl was on top of a box of uniforms, teary-eyed and red faced. As if she weren’t a robot, Dee Dee rushed to her side before catching herself and offering her hand on the girl’s shoulder, the door swinging shut behind her.

 

“I-I’m okay, I just had a fight with my...” The girl offered up as an excuse before catching herself. Dee Dee didn’t need anymore information however, the way the girl stumbled over the end of the sentence gave her the answer. “Nevermind, I’m okay Miss Allen. That’s your name right? Dee Dee Allen? My mom keep getting you guys mixed up, even though she never stops talking about you guys. She thinks you’re all at fault for Emma and... and the thoughts I’ve been having. Oh god I’m rambling I’m so sorry.” Dee Dee was caught off guard by everything that had just been said, her eyes fluttering slightly as she tried to process it. This girl must be the mystery girlfriend, but she also was the daughter of the PTA lady that couldn’t get her name right to save her life. There was no excuse for ignorance and Dee Dee had stressed that in the Apples and Bees place Tom had taken her to, but clearly this woman couldn’t even get it right to her own child.

 

What was she doing? She was focusing on herself and this child was just staring at her like she had seven heads. She needed to be... considerate? Was that the word for it? She wanted to help this girl and let her know that she was there for her, but she wasn’t Barry or Angie. She didn’t know how to be nice, let alone actually care about someone else’s feelings. Or did she? When she first fell in love with her now ex-husband, she was nice, right? She loved him and she would do things for him. That didn’t last long, and after those fifteen heart-pulverizing years she didn’t know how to be nice anymore. She had to relearn, and she had to relearn quick if she wanted to console this girl. “Listen... I think your name’s Alyssa? I remember Emma saying it before once or something, but if I’m wrong I’m wrong, you need to know that your mother... is an insufferable idiot.” Dee Dee saw the girl flinch at the insult and quickly started backtracking, not knowing how to be helpful, “I mean, not an idiot. She just doesn’t understand that gay people, and gay positive people, are just who they are. You... You know Emma is trying to be the best she can for you and for the situation, but things are hard. And I don’t know what you two fought about but I know that it can be fixed, and that if you really want to fix it, you’ll know how to.” She offered a smile to Alyssa, tentatively waiting to continue speaking. What she didn’t expect was the girl to fling her arms around her and hug her. She patted the girl on the back, trying to be sympathetic, and continued to speak as the girl cried into her chest. “Listen, I promise things will work out. Barry is on an impossible quest to help her and it seems like everyone but me was on board to help but... After seeing you here, I think I’m on board too. I can’t have another little lesbian hiding and crying.” She smiled a genuine smile down at the girl, knowing that she had found her reason to change.

 

“You, you can’t tell anyone. Kaylee and Shelby already know and Emma and I... We aren’t even together anymore,” The pain in her voice was evident as she looked up at Dee Dee with wide eyes, Alyssa moving back from the hug to meet her eyes fully, “Miss Allen, you-you _can’t tell anyone_. My mother would flip, and I’m already scared enough to come out. I want to be there for Emma but she says that wanting isn’t enough and she’s right but I just _can’t._ ” Alyssa was trembling and close to crying again as she waited for the diva’s response, only getting a sad smile from Dee Dee at first. Was there really anything she could get out of it to tell anyone? No, not at all. But she knew that she was going to have to talk to Barry or Angie and get Emma to make things right because this tiny lesbian with her cute curly hair was going to steal Dee Dee’s heart. It made her wish she’d become a mother, just so she could console her own child in times like this.

 

Maybe she wasn’t a mother, but she knew that she had the ability to console someone like this, and if she could console one, why couldn’t she make it a point to be more selfless more often? “You have my word Alyssa, but you have to promise me you’ll try and talk to Emma. She needs you, even if she doesn’t see it. And you need her, I can tell.” Alyssa nodded, promising that she would talk to Emma the next chance she got, even if it was just a text message. Dee Dee patted the girl on the head and slipped out of the band closet, taking a deep breath and heading down the hall trying to find Tom’s office once more. She didn’t know how to process what had just happened, but it felt like she had learned something. Like she had actually become a human being again instead of an aging narcissistic robot like the New York Times had thought her to be. Maybe she could do this whole being nice thing.


End file.
